Reflections on Lotus

Before entering into lotus pose I feel a stirring, a movement, a restlessness; wondering, what will come next? Will I blossom? Will I find fulfillment in my life and be able to give back? What purpose am I here for? This Divine Plan that I am a part of – whats going to come of it and when? It is the end of an old cycle and the start of a new; the time of transition, happening right here and now. I feel it in my bodies wake; something is happening that I have to yet see the culmination of; it isn’t the time to make visible what is being but has yet to come. The seeds have been sown and are now burrowed in soils embrace; I, the one who is impatient. But why? What’s the rush? This process has nothing to do with my worth or okay-ness; it is a process of life living itself through me. Can I remember that? Can I not take things as such personal jabs to my esteem and rather relax into this miracle unfolding? In that way, might I be a more capable handmaiden for these gifts? Capable in the sense of recognition: I play a part in this…that paradox of being important, of course, and totally not. There is a vision from Eagle to mediate the difference between that which wants to move and the stillness from which movement is revealed. Right now is the slowing time, the time where Earth is frozen over, when waters too are seeming to stop with sheets of ice; the time of hibernation, of pause. If growth were to happen now, the cold would only kill that which wants to live. The seeds are germinating and they must do so. These cycles are a part of the life death life rhythm that we are each, whether we embrace or resist, are intrinsically a part of too. At this time, what is dying in me? What is gestating, preparing to emerge? I can feel the pulse of something new, the sense of what is to come and yet has it to make an appearance. Do I trust it is there? I know it to be so; it is an experiential truth. I remember, life is birthed at the right time and not through force and ambition. The invitation now is to wait and be present throughout the process. It is the journey, so they say. Before growth, let the sediment settle. I am reminded of water. Of the lotus. How hard it can be to see to the deep when water has been shaken up. First things have to find there place then what is underneath will be exposed and the Path will become clear, not at all once but gradually, little by little. There is the light, always. All the shifts that have taken place need to re-organize in this body mind before they slowly lift towards the surface, the world outside there ready to receive. I have the time. So I sit, in lotus pose, with my feet crossed, both atop opposite thighs. It is as if when I enter the pose I am stuck. I put myself into a container; the feet are bound to one another, to the base, and that stillness that I knew I had needed is the only real option. My feet, wrapped around eachother and settled in my seat, hold a place for me to peer within by stopping my inclination to do, move, be somebody through action. Now, my action is stillness to attune to another kind of movement. Movement is always happening, at different levels of expressive tone. Sometimes, it is so very subtle, like small waves. Other times, it is almost difficult to not see what is so apparent. But if those big shifts happen repetitively turbulence is created. To give the time and space for resolution is like the seasons and what their teachings. Cycles, although blending into eachother, do have distinction.

Creating Sacred Space

The Earth is sacred, alive, our Mother. Our bodies, a temple for the Divine to experience this life. All our relations whether they walk or fly or slither are embedded with the sacred, are mirror images of oneness having divided itself for the sake of playing, learning, evolution. How often is this remembered? How easy is it to slip into such forgetfulness that what was known, and still is somewhere, can hardly be recognized? It is like meeting a best friend from grade school as an elder and being unaware of who they truly are. That is what it’s like to forget. And yet that moment, when the gears set in motion and recall comes back, that is She!, it is undeniable, of course. It couldn’t be otherwise. We are beings made of Light and vibration, imbued with the Great Force of the Universe, a power to be revered. Joyfully, there could be celebration with this recognition of the limitless potentials called moments, our ability as creators to create, and the way we are filled to the brim with star stuff. There was a time when this wasn’t in question. There also came a time when this truth seemed to be forgotten, and continues to be forgotten in the moments of daily life. Perhaps, somewhere, it is still as luminous as ever. How would you know? How might I find out? The depth of this vastness is beyond my comprehension or my ability to explain in words. Maybe if I could go back to being an infant, warm, present, and undivided, I would again be that. Am I ever not that Light and vibration? Is it like the sun that gets covered over by clouds but is still there shining? Is there a place where the sun has no shadow? What might that place be like? Is it possible, that it could be here, on Earth? In brief, and fleeting moments, I feel as though I know: I am not this body, I am not this mind. It can be quite disorienting, but even more painful becomes believing that I am this body and this mind and all that comes along with it – the judgment, doubt, shame, blame, the indecision, fear, anxiety. All those Earthly things. And yet, I am here on Earth. That is a fact. A medial walker, moving between two worlds, the worlds of appearances, of the unmanifest and manifest, the world of invisibility and form. These worlds, this play, the creators, us – what is the responsibility here? How do we create a sacred space that acknowledges, reveres, and steps into the gracious opportunity to be a co-creator with the Divine? What might that look like? And how, will we know when it’s happening? It cannot just be a one time thing but a choice made again and again and again.