No god is god within

In the early hours of morning, When ravens gossip and coo in a language enticing yet hard to decipher, Like sounds of speaking underwater or babies first meeting their tongues, It is then in that newness, I move my body in all directions and go within. The sun has risen in the east; highest peaks catch and reflect its glow, As I scribbled thoughts in my journal. Insights come from a breathing body that prays through shapes, Prayers are dynamic, they have to be, alive. Awareness and longing deconstruct what was mechanical, They initiate; responsibility and choice spin wheels. My mind like a wheel with many facets, I think to myself: I might as well believe there is no God If such thought returns me to my God within. It is a fantasy, a fairytale as white as snow That if I pray long and hard I will get just what I ask for. That prayer is this way and not that. That it is an obligation rather than a spontaneous act of devotion and love. The idea that prayer is enough; is it true? Praying is only a step up the staircase of the spine, Choice is another, Waiting for the reply takes two, The action that aligns is a prayer being born, It is through becoming responsible that my life transforms into an offering. There are no magical wands that cure with one swift swing, but there is magic. It is in the ordinary moments of each day, The moments when I decide which way to turn, And walk with my own two feet, one following the next. God does not give answers. It would only disempower to be told what to do. God wants you to choose. To trust in your own resources, To draw upon your wisdom wel Solve the riddle, Discover the problem, Apply the solution, All of this we are told since youth. Answers are limitations and we have enough of those already. What if questions led to more questions? Questions that enliven wonder and curiosity, Questions that open doors and keep them open, Isn’t life about evolution? What if people just want to be heard and not fixed? If understanding comes through being with, If we knew all this then would we see the miracles? The forces here to aid: They come in the forms of hollyhocks and Artemis, Cold water and schools of fish, Seeds moving on the wind, Seeds that fall into my fingertips at just the right moment, They come in the form of chestnuts and thistle, motherwort and roses, Those sharp thorns that call my attention, Stay alert, Stay awake They come in the form of what I don’t want to hear, but need to, Of being let down and disappointed, That is what dispels illusions, revealing expectations set too high, They come in the form of dreams of spiders, Altars and candlelight, Cats that teach of independence, And she who sits on a Lion. Life is my own invention, Someone told me that, Life can be re-invented, and those are called moments, She told me that. What makes my life worth living? What kind of person do I want to be? Questions such as these are guideposts pointing me towards my heart beating, What are my answers? Only I know. They are verbs. In action.

Cobra – Bhujangasana

Cobra pose requires that I engage in order to expand around my heart; a parallel to my life. As I am present with the freshness of each moment and aware, I realize how much I can let go by without noticing or appreciating. It is similar in cobra pose: it seems easy to forget to actively involve the lower half of my body but that is exactly what is needed to keep me strong. That is where I lift from. The stable foundation supports becoming and letting go. When my foundation is well secured I emerge new and reveal my heart. When I live life from my heart it takes on a different meaning and perspective. In the pose there is a certain amount of pressure put on me that allows for the rising. Pressure, so often, has negative correlations. Peer pressure, pressure on myself, pressuring others, too much pressure I think I might burst. In my mind it is tied up in doing things that I didn’t want to do or trying to get others to do what they do not want to do. It relates to feelings of overwhelm and too much to handle. The cobra evokes a different kind of pressure, though, and helps me in discovering a new way to look at pressure in general.Life isn’t some easy thing; sometimes there are easeful moments, but then other times the pressures on and I need to learn the lessons from cobra: rise, expand, shed, let go. If I want to shed my hardened skin, release my limitations, outdated stories, narratives, and beliefs…if I want to grow and upgrade myself…if I want to be alive, vulnerable and authentic, then my efforts are needed to face the challenges. Cobra helps me in meeting the challenges of my life straight on, from a heart centered place, where I know my ground. There are shadows in life, and in all of us. Aspects of the personality that I am not particularly pleased with or necessarily want others to see or to see in others. Those exact aspects are what were developed, just as the snake skin, to protect me and keep me safe. They serve a purpose, and are a helpmeet. There may too come a time when they are no longer needed and I can make that choice with awareness and discrimination. To keep things in perspective: there would be no shadows if it were not for the sun. All of these partrs of myself that at times I want to omit out of my life are actually a part of being human and on the ground. I don’t have to punish myself for being selfish, jealous, insecure…for being righteously indignant, prideful, emotional. I can rather tend to my heart and understand myself. Where did these qualities come from? What is tender and vulnerable under the thickened layers of skin? I can try my best to keep a straight head on my shoulders seeing the larger picture and not just the parts. Instead of puffing up and threatening, or coiling in on myself, I can be what I am, just how I am. We’ve all got a shadow, and we are the Light of the sun. Warm-ups Start by warming up the spine, particularly the low back for Cobra pose. Downward dog, moving bridge pose and cat stretches are good for the whole spine. childs pose, or knees to chest can help warm up the low back. To prepare the heart and shoulders hare pose can be helpful or some shoulders and neck rolls.Cool-Downs After cobra pose either lying childs or childs pose can support the opposite motion of the low back. Sitting forward fold or tortoise pose can also do this.Alignment To protect the lower back be sure to firm the lower half of the body. Instead of lifting straight up with the side first come forward and then rise, keeping the spinal column long.Entering/ExitingCome to lye on your belly with the head turned towards one side, take a few breathes. Turn the head towards the other side take a few breathes.Feel into the lower abdomen and pelvis.Bring either the forehead or chin to the mat. Explore both options and do what feels best for your body.Bring the hands down by the side of the hips palm facing down. The hands can also be placed underneath the shoulders with elbows bent. If you do this make sure that you are using the strength from your legs and back rather then pressing into the hands.Engage the legs, press the thighs into the floor and firm the buttocks.Press the pelvis into the floor and elongate the spine forward and up lifting the front of the body off of the floor.Draw the shoulder blades back towards each other and the hands down towards the feet to expand around the heart. If your hands are under the shoulders still draw the shoulder blades together to open the front of the body.Stay in as long as feels comfortable for you.To come out, gently lower down, relax the entire body, and turn the head towards one side and then the other.PracticesWhile in the cobra explore one of the following questions:What makes me coil in on myself and protect?What am I ready to shed and let go of?When do I disengage with my life and what does it take to stay engaged?What does pressure have to teach me in my life and how can it help me grow?

Warrior 2 Virabhadrasana 2

In Warrior pose I reflect on what I want and what strength I need to cultivate. When I build the pose from the ground up I realize that a stable stance is necessary to rise from a centered place. Such lift requires me to meet situations straight on and be straight with myself and others while having a capacity to bend and rotate but not break. It is such strength that I emerge out of. It becomes clear what I am up against is my own lower nature. Others are the mirror for me to see both my shortcomings and victories. I battle these aspects of myself for the sake of being the love that I am in Essence. It is my responsibility to take action and stretch beyond my limitations. The warrior asks me to respond to the Light, and in that responsiveness to do what needs to be done. There is no time to play small or back down while in battle; it is time to face myself, act, pray and release. When I take ownership of my life I can make changes and create. I can learn from the past, have a vision for the future, and stand with the present. I have choice and opportunity awaits. At times, I need to do what isn’t comfortable to cooperate with my evolution. What is asked of me isn’t always what I want for myself and to listen to the Divine requires both my effort and surrender. To stay in the moment with alertness supports my ability to discern. It doesn’t serve me to dwell on what has happened and be carried by my mind to the past. I need to keep my vision towards the goal and stay present. To be a warrior I cannot hold myself to an outdated image; upgrading and transformation are key. It is up to me; I can take responsibility and become the person I want to be. Each moment I can approach from an empowered place. Warm-Ups You can warm up the whole body by doing a few Sun Salutations. This will also help to stretch the hips and legs. Other hip warm ups to explore could be tree pose, bound angle, both on the wall or lying down, and wide angle forward fold. Hare, either standing or kneeling, will help to warm the shoulders and expand the chest.Cool-Downs After Warrior 2 you can either stand in Mountain pose and notice the effects on your mind and body or go into Wide Angle Forward Fold. Wide Angle Forward Fold can also be done before transitioning to the other side. Alginment Explore the weight on the feet and see that both sides of the feet, and the back of the feet, are pressing into the floor equally. Notice the difference between the rotation in the legs: the back leg is rotating inward to follow the foot below and the front leg is rotating outward drawing the knee towards the outside edge of the foot. You should still be able to see your toes past your knee. Feel that your upper body lifts from the hips. As a way to see if you are centered you can lean slightly towards the front and towards the back, returning to center and rising. Take a look at the arms and see that they are straight across the body.Entering/ExitingStep into a wide leg stance facing the long end of the mat.Turn one foot 45 degrees in (back foot) and the other foot 90 degrees out (front foot) facing the short end of the mat. See that the heel of the front foot is algined with the instep of the back foot.Lift the arms toward the sky and bring them into a T position outstretched from the shoulders. Take a look at your back arm and see that it is straight across from the front arm. Reach out of the index fingers to open the chest. Look over the front hand with a soft gaze.Bend at the front knee and ensure that you can still see your toes. Draw the knee slightly towards the pinky side of the foot. Engage the back leg.To come out, straighten the front leg, turn both feet towards the long end of the mat, release the arms.When you are ready, transition towards the other side.PracticesReflect on what your responsibilities are. How do you respond to your life? To what you know? What does it mean to you to take responsibility; would you do something differently?What are the obstacles you need to overcome and what inner strength will help you do so?

Spider

The spider, she follows me.There at the door, waiting.A blackened body with legs close to her center,I see her now just like in my dreams.What is this world anyways?Is it any different then a dream?What makes it so; can you tell?I’m still trying to untangle from her web,But she has me in her strands of love.A love unknown and of the finest silk,Intricately catching rays of sun and morning dew.Her presence calls me to myself.In a moment of wonder, I ask,Who are you?All of your creation, it can be gone in a moment,Is it worth all of the effort?She keeps on going,Weaving.

Heart seed

Inside walls of steel is where my heart was kept,Protected from all things scary and less then perfect.There, in its hidden closure, were secret fears of failure.“Mistakes lead to consequences,imperfection equates isolation.”Such thoughts shatter worlds.Loneliness overflows with hope and longing.Will I make the right choice?Can I trust my own self?I don’t want to admit my fears, a voice whispers.A seed longs for Light;Underneath appearances are other worlds, awaiting.Worlds teeming with potential.Emerging and becoming is a natural course in time.That absolutely beautiful, absolutely imperfect, flower.Without grandiosity or show,It is itself.Authenticity is a choice.